Every morning she woke up. Every morning she breathed in the morning air. Every morning she wished he was waking up next to her.
Missing him had become an every-day part of her life. An odd part, seeing as they worked together every day, but a part nonetheless. She missed who he was outside of work. She missed the laid back, open, loving man he was on the inside.
She despised his work persona. Not that at-work-Tony was a particularly bad guy, it just wasn't the man she was in love with - the man she missed.
They had so much history together. History that Tim nor Abby nor even Gibbs knew about. The person who knew most about their history was probably Jenny. And every time she thought about that, it made her even more angry that Jenny put Tony undercover. As an agent Ziva understood Jenny's position, but as a woman it screamed betrayal.
She went to work, saw Tony, and smiled sweetly as her heart shattered once again. It had become as routine as breathing.
It was sad that she'd become so used to this. It was sad that she kept hoping this routine would change.
It was even more sad that she feared that one day it would.